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RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Spiral - 05-29-2012 Yea.. it may actually be better than seek the challenge after comparing the scripts. I definitely want to use something while using Remove from negativity within and that may be it. RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Cortez - 06-06-2012 I love when I have realizations of what I really need to work on. After the alpha set I know what I need to do and it's two things that I think the alpha set actually works on, but I really need to dig in a little deeper to these two things. One of them is my fear of rejection/failure. I've made some huge progress on this and looking back on how I was, it's amazing to me how different I actually am now. but even so, it still persists to this day. It's surely almost entirely based off of having my perceived notion of myself challenged and I've learned to let go of my monstrous ego a lot, but I there's still so much work yet to be done. Perhaps that's why I was always such a fan of things that forcefully put me outside my ego, and of course for the sake of decorum I won't go in to detail. The point is, though, that no matter what path you take, if you're doing what needs to be done to better connect to people and stop limiting yourself, life is a million times brighter and I'm really optimistic my life. I feel like I'm at the cusp of something great. The other thing that I really need to work on is procrastination. This is a trademark of my family and I learned it at a really young age. I'm making great strides to beat it, however and I will continue until I do. I absolutely want to be rid of this filthy habit and make the most of my time. Currently, I no longer play video games, my leisure time is essentially spent socializing or being outside instead of watching tv(for the most part) and I exercise more than I ever had before in my life, but there's yet more work to be done and as God as my witness, I will overcome these two negative aspects of myself. So I was thinking of tackling the rejection first with Overcome Fear of rejection/ Winners mindset for the first month or two after alpha and then Overcome Procrastination/ Seize the day or (ASC 4g) after that. Seems like a pretty solid plan to me. RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Ryan - 06-06-2012 Go for it Ryan RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Shannon - 06-06-2012 AM 5.0 makes much more specific and direct work of those two specific things within you, actually. Next time you run through AM, make it 5.0 and see what you think. RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - RainbowAbyss - 06-07-2012 (05-27-2012, 01:55 PM)Cortez Wrote: Thank you, Rainbow. Is that mostly Alpha or r u running some other practices as well? RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Cortez - 06-09-2012 I was trying to do Carpe Diem as well, but I don't have the time. I've just been listening to Alpha 2011 while I sleep. RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Cortez - 06-11-2012 This month has been trying to say the least. I think I should probably throw in happiness and joy when I start stage 5. Actually I think that is pretty much a necessity, lol. I'll get through, though. However, on a positive note, I have slowed down a lot and been a lot more loving with people lately. It feels really great, almost like I have been living completely in the moment half the time. I really want this feeling all the time. RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Spiral - 06-12-2012 I didn't think the rest of alpha male set would be a problem for you haha RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Cortez - 06-13-2012 It's not the set. It's just life. Sometimes you get blindsided by a lot of things at once. I've got a handle on it, though. RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Cortez - 06-22-2012 I feel like I am stronger than I've ever been before even though it's been a rocky month. I feel like I've been awakened and I can't really turn back. I've been having these flashes of overwhelming feelings of love and gratitude. I want to support life in every way possible. I am almost completely different now than I was even six months ago. Lately I've come to the realization of what kind of life would make me happier than anything else and that is absolute freedom. I need freedom not only from the grind of working life, but also as far away from society as I can be. I've always intuitively felt that I would be the most happy if I had my own secluded farm or ranch that I could live on free from society. It would be hard work, but it would be fulfilling. It's funny that when I started thinking this way I ran in to a friend I hadn't seen in a while yesterday and she told me she has some friends that do intensive organic gardening and sustainable living courses that start with a 30 day wilderness excursion. Sounds pretty bad ass to me. There's a lot of land here in Oklahoma that is cheap too. I think I'm going to be purchasing some soon. Having a small farm, maybe some livestock, that would be paradise for me. It's amazing how I can't shake this idea. I want to be completely mentally free from all this mental influence we have shoved both down our throats and up our asses 24/7. I believe it was the Buddha who said that if you even get a small taste of enlightenment, then nothing else will satisfy you. I had a nice little journey a few months back and I definitely got a taste. If you can really see how two dimensional this world is it's an incredible experience. I used to feel as everyone else does that I need to find my path to what will satisfy me in life and using whatever means I have to get there, buying shit, getting prestige, having sex with beautiful women, etc. Well I've done all that and found it to ultimately be very un-fulfilling. Ultimately it all boiled down to me realizing that I don't need anything that I thought I did. Connection with other people, building them up and helping this world in any way I can is the only thing that fulfills me. The funny thing is, though, that this realization actually made me cut some ties with people. For instance, I'm not seeing any girls right now and I'm almost entirely indifferent to that fact. Consequently, that's causing them to be drawn to me like crazy, but I have high standards of what it takes for any woman to get attention from these days. Btw, I'm on stage 5 right now. I'd say it's having some good effects on me. Haha RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Spiral - 06-22-2012 Nice Cortez, are you just running Alpha right now? I've been feeling great on stage 4 man. I LOVE it! RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Cortez - 06-23-2012 Yes, I'm just running alpha. While I sleep is the only time I really have to listen. I really think that after what running through 2011 after running 2010 alpha is doing for me, that running Alpha 5.0 after that is going to blow the gates wide open. I know I've been saying this for a few years now, but I still think I'd prefer an "Awakened mind/spirit" six stage set as opposed to the Alpha set, but I do love the Alpha Set a lot. RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - K-Train - 06-23-2012 I know it's still early, but what are your plans after running Alpha Cortez? Are you going to run SM2.0 or work on some other things using some of the single stage subs? RE: The Modern Libertine's diary - Cortez - 06-23-2012 I'm not really interested in SM anymore. I'll probably just do some single stage subs that look interesting and then probably do the Alpha set again. |